GORILLA BLOG http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm Thu, 02 May 2013 02:39:45 GMT http://bandzoogle.com Comet on Sunday then the Midwest!!! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=4169294 The official release will be in July. You (our friends) can purchase a copy at a Gorillas' show now!!! Aren't we good to you? You know we are. You dirty little... Friday, May 3rd PRIVATE SHOW!!! Leewood Country Club 1 Leewood Dr. Eastchester, NY 10709 Sun, May 5 @ 6PM The Blue Comet 106 S Easton Rd Glenside, PA 19038 Thu, May 9 @ 8PM The 21st Saloon 4727 S 96th St Omaha, NE 68127 May 10th @ 9PM Uncle Bo's 420 Southeast 6th Avenue Topeka, KS 66607 May 11th @ 8PM Knuckleheads Saloon 2715 Rochester Avenue Kansas City, MO 64120
The official release will be in July.
You (our friends) can purchase a copy at a Gorillas' show now!!!
Aren't we good to you?
You know we are.
You dirty little...

Friday, May 3rd
PRIVATE SHOW!!!
Leewood Country Club
1 Leewood Dr.
Eastchester, NY 10709

Sun, May 5 @ 6PM
The Blue Comet
106 S Easton Rd
Glenside, PA 19038

Thu, May 9 @ 8PM
The 21st Saloon
4727 S 96th St
Omaha, NE 68127

May 10th @ 9PM
Uncle Bo's
420 Southeast 6th Avenue
Topeka, KS 66607

May 11th @ 8PM
Knuckleheads Saloon
2715 Rochester Avenue
Kansas City, MO 64120


]]> Thu, 02 May 2013 02:39:45 GMT AE80C095F05A9ED919754C32FFCCC798 Finally in Jersey again... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3953270 Not these idiots! These idiots!!! Friday, April 12th @ 9 pm Roxy & Dukes Roadhouse 745 Bound Brook Rd Dunellen, NJ 08812 732-529-4464 Saturday, April 13th @ 7 pm The second annual Summit Swing Dance Party! Summit Elks Lodge 40 Maple Street Summit, NJ Not these idiots!

These idiots!!!


Friday, April 12th @ 9 pm
Roxy & Dukes Roadhouse
745 Bound Brook Rd
Dunellen, NJ 08812
732-529-4464

Saturday, April 13th @ 7 pm
The second annual Summit Swing Dance Party!
Summit Elks Lodge
40 Maple Street
Summit, NJ]]> Wed, 10 Apr 2013 05:47:06 GMT D1A66FACBD8FBF6962253E678972552A Bringing the Spring to Virginia and Delaware... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3820767 Passover has come and Easter will soon be here... And the Gas House Gorillas will be rockin' ass for Holy Week in Virginia and Delaware! These two places have not seen near enough of your Gorillas for quite some time. Don't just sit at home waiting for the angel of death. We will be having fun of a biblical proportion! Good Friday will now be GREAT Friday. And Saturday will be SPECTACULAR something or other...you get the picture. One final morsel to tempt the more cynical among you... The Easter Bunny will be with us...that's right the Easter Bunny...a.k.a...Eddie Everett....He IS the Easter Bunny...ssshhhhh! It's a secret, though I do think that the socks are a dead giveaway. Do I need to draw you a diagram, Lazarus? COME OUT, YA CRAZY BASTARDS!!! Friday, March 29th @ 9 pm Blue 5 312 2nd Street Southwest Roanoke, VA, 24011 Saturday, March 30th @ 9:30 pm Bethany Blues 18385 Coastal Highway Lewes, DE 19958 302-644-2500
Passover has come and Easter will soon be here...
And the Gas House Gorillas will be rockin' ass for Holy Week in Virginia and Delaware!
These two places have not seen near enough of your Gorillas for quite some time.
Don't just sit at home waiting for the angel of death.
We will be having fun of a biblical proportion!
Good Friday will now be GREAT Friday.
And Saturday will be SPECTACULAR something or other...you get the picture.

One final morsel to tempt the more cynical among you...

The Easter Bunny will be with us...that's right the Easter Bunny...a.k.a...Eddie Everett....He IS the Easter Bunny...ssshhhhh!
It's a secret, though I do think that the socks are a dead giveaway.

Do I need to draw you a diagram, Lazarus?

COME OUT, YA CRAZY BASTARDS!!!

Friday, March 29th @ 9 pm
Blue 5
312 2nd Street Southwest
Roanoke, VA, 24011

Saturday, March 30th @ 9:30 pm
Bethany Blues
18385 Coastal Highway
Lewes, DE 19958
302-644-2500
]]> Tue, 26 Mar 2013 18:30:00 GMT 74DD7E36688824E57804FD6F8529441A We heard you missed us... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3561876 So here we are! Let's see...what's new since the last time we saw you? ...um... Jim lost the last of his baby teeth! Yeah, he got a dollar from the tooth fairy. Of course that went right up his nose. The dollar I mean. Jim is strange... Oh! Eddie finally got out of jail. Yeah, he's okay. He just has to register with the local authorities when he moves. Snake got married! That was a few years ago, but... BIG NEWS! Crusher quit drinking!!! It lasted a day.... He seems to drink quite a bit more since he quit. Rick? Things haven't been the same since he found Jesus. Now he refuses to sing anything but Christian Contemporary Music with an uplifting message. Fortunately the Gas House Gorillas play nothing but!!! There was one last thing...let me see...um... THERE IS A NEW GHG ALBUM COMING YOUR WAY FROM LANARK RECORDS AND IT'S A KILLER!!! PUNK AMERICANA IS COMING! In the meantime: March 1st @ 9 pm Roxy & Dukes Roadhouse 745 Bound Brook Rd Dunellen, NJ 08812 732-529-4464 March 2nd @ 9 pm The Spanish Ballroom 7300 MacArthur Boulevard Glen Echo, MD 20812 March 3rd @ 6:00 pm The Blue Comet Glenside, PA March 7th @ 8 pm Court Street Grill 112 Court St Pomeroy, OH 45769 740-992-6524 March 8th @ 9 pm Liberty Tavern 50 S. Liberty Street, #104 Powell, Ohio 43065 March 9th @ 9 pm 411 Club 411 North Westnedge Avenue Kalamazoo, MI 49007
So here we are!
Let's see...what's new since the last time we saw you?

...um...

Jim lost the last of his baby teeth! Yeah, he got a dollar from the tooth fairy. Of course that went right up his nose. The dollar I mean. Jim is strange...

Oh! Eddie finally got out of jail. Yeah, he's okay. He just has to register with the local authorities when he moves.

Snake got married! That was a few years ago, but...

BIG NEWS!

Crusher quit drinking!!!
It lasted a day....
He seems to drink quite a bit more since he quit.

Rick?

Things haven't been the same since he found Jesus.
Now he refuses to sing anything but Christian Contemporary Music with an uplifting message.

Fortunately the Gas House Gorillas play nothing but!!!

There was one last thing...let me see...um...

THERE IS A NEW GHG ALBUM COMING YOUR WAY FROM LANARK RECORDS AND IT'S A KILLER!!!

PUNK AMERICANA IS COMING!

In the meantime:

March 1st @ 9 pm
Roxy & Dukes Roadhouse
745 Bound Brook Rd
Dunellen, NJ 08812
732-529-4464

March 2nd @ 9 pm
The Spanish Ballroom
7300 MacArthur Boulevard
Glen Echo, MD 20812

March 3rd @ 6:00 pm
The Blue Comet
Glenside, PA

March 7th @ 8 pm
Court Street Grill
112 Court St
Pomeroy, OH 45769
740-992-6524

March 8th @ 9 pm
Liberty Tavern
50 S. Liberty Street, #104
Powell, Ohio 43065

March 9th @ 9 pm
411 Club
411 North Westnedge Avenue
Kalamazoo, MI 49007

]]> Tue, 26 Feb 2013 01:05:00 GMT 1B12078B3E81B8D7C278503190A59140 Help your Gorillas Restore the Shore!!! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3294865 Let's show 'em what a Gorilla crowd looks like! <a href="https://www.facebook.com/events/122791911222637/" target="_new">
Let's show 'em what a Gorilla crowd looks like!

]]> Wed, 16 Jan 2013 18:30:00 GMT E53D418599D3E843C2F04331A8C3BFAE Happy New Year! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3272540 Ladies and Genitals, If any of our dear friends out there signed up for this newsletter a long time ago and you are just receiving your first one now... I will not lie to you... That's right, People. It takes a big man to admit responsibility, and I plan to do just that. Right here and now. You see...it was all Crusher's fault. He told me not to include you! I wanted to desperately! He wouldn't let me! Such a cruel heartless bastard! Imagine depriving one such as yourself the chance to connect with the greatest band on the face of the earth, the Gas House Gorillas! He is an evil monster!!! A vile contemptible ogre! Now, if you talk to him I'm sure he'll say something like, &quot;Rick forgot to enter your info.&quot; Yeah right. Like I would ever do THAT. It's a lie!!! A loathsome fabrication from a desperate cretin with a Napoleon complex! Okay...I did forgot some of you. All of you actually. Shut up. Saturday, January 19th @ 6:00pm Brick Township High School 346 Chambers Bridge Road Brick, NJ 08723
Ladies and Genitals,

If any of our dear friends out there signed up for this newsletter a long time ago and you are just receiving your first one now...
I will not lie to you...
That's right, People. It takes a big man to admit responsibility, and I plan to do just that. Right here and now.

You see...it was all Crusher's fault.
He told me not to include you! I wanted to desperately! He wouldn't let me! Such a cruel heartless bastard! Imagine depriving one such as yourself the chance to connect with the greatest band on the face of the earth, the Gas House Gorillas!
He is an evil monster!!! A vile contemptible ogre!
Now, if you talk to him I'm sure he'll say something like, "Rick forgot to enter your info."

Yeah right. Like I would ever do THAT.

It's a lie!!! A loathsome fabrication from a desperate cretin with a Napoleon complex!

Okay...I did forgot some of you.

All of you actually.

Shut up.

Saturday, January 19th @ 6:00pm
Brick Township High School
346 Chambers Bridge Road Brick, NJ 08723
]]> Fri, 11 Jan 2013 19:15:00 GMT 03ACB2198D67945BB2CCCE632A5FF72E Happy Mayan Apocalypse! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3171379 We here at Gas House Gorillas have been rather troubled as of late. You see, Boys &amp; Girls...we just happen to believe in a little thing called tradition. Yeah, that's right...he's going there. Rampant commercialism has tainted my beloved holiday with flashy images of a fat man in red pajamas and glowing plastic reindeer spewing their snow covered propaganda to a dumbed down constituancy, too dulled on Devil Dogs, cheese and grape soda to care. Free toys for all you say? Sounds like a little thing called Socialism to me. I'll purchase my own toys, thankyouverymuch. Every year the holiday season comes and goes and yours truly just keeps his mouth shut. &quot;Don't make waves.&quot; I tell myself, &quot;It's not that big a deal.&quot; Well it is to me! Where may one find true holiday spirit, Mr. Scrooge? Where must one go, for a return to the holiday cheer that once made this nation great? Can it be found at a parade? No, you numbskull. At a festive family gathering perhaps? Are you high? No, Tiny Tim...there is only one place to find the real meaning of the holiday. The Blue Comet... (wait for it) with THE GAS HOUSE GORILLAS!!! Word is that Santa will have a gift for you. It's a toys for tots drive, Virginia. So bring an unopened toy for a kid who needs one and stop being such a cranky-pants for once. Humbug. Sunday, December 23 6:00 pm The Blue Comet 106 S. Easton Rd. Glenside, PA
We here at Gas House Gorillas have been rather troubled as of late. You see, Boys & Girls...we just happen to believe in a little thing called tradition. Yeah, that's right...he's going there.
Rampant commercialism has tainted my beloved holiday with flashy images of a fat man in red pajamas and glowing plastic reindeer spewing their snow covered propaganda to a dumbed down constituancy, too dulled on Devil Dogs, cheese and grape soda to care.
Free toys for all you say?
Sounds like a little thing called Socialism to me.
I'll purchase my own toys, thankyouverymuch.
Every year the holiday season comes and goes and yours truly just keeps his mouth shut. "Don't make waves." I tell myself, "It's not that big a deal."
Well it is to me!
Where may one find true holiday spirit, Mr. Scrooge?
Where must one go, for a return to the holiday cheer that once made this nation great?
Can it be found at a parade?
No, you numbskull.
At a festive family gathering perhaps?
Are you high?
No, Tiny Tim...there is only one place to find the real meaning of the holiday.
The Blue Comet...
(wait for it)
with THE GAS HOUSE GORILLAS!!!
Word is that Santa will have a gift for you.
It's a toys for tots drive, Virginia.
So bring an unopened toy for a kid who needs one and stop being such a cranky-pants for once.
Humbug.

Sunday, December 23
6:00 pm
The Blue Comet
106 S. Easton Rd.
Glenside, PA

]]> Wed, 19 Dec 2012 03:20:06 GMT A4AD01AA23DD98A37AC1D2A81072B68B A Gorilla Tribute to Jimi... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3063538 70 years old today and still dead. Had he lived he'd have probably performed a medley with Christina Aguilera and Furgie at the Superbowl halftime show. They would have kicked it off with a gorgeous rendition of &quot;Beautiful&quot;. Following with &quot;Let Me Stand Next to your Fire&quot;, featuring the Foo Fighters and a rap that paid special tribute to all of our beloved &quot;first responders&quot; by 50 Cent. Of course, the big finish would have been &ldquo;Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night&rdquo;. Jimi would have played a fiery solo over the pulsing synthetic groove of that last one. He would have been surrounded by painted up blonde girls wearing hot pants and go go boots. The girls would have danced over the top renditions of popular 60's steps that would have seemed quaint and adorable. There would be a giant peace sign above the stage right below the Budweiser logo. Jimi would conclude with the Star Spangled Banner and there would be not a dry eye in the house... (deep sigh) We miss ya, Jimi. You could have been Mickey Mouse. {:8())-
70 years old today and still dead.

Had he lived he'd have probably performed a medley with Christina Aguilera and Furgie at the Superbowl halftime show.
They would have kicked it off with a gorgeous rendition of "Beautiful". Following with "Let Me Stand Next to your Fire", featuring the Foo Fighters and a rap that paid special tribute to all of our beloved "first responders" by 50 Cent.
Of course, the big finish would have been “Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night”.
Jimi would have played a fiery solo over the pulsing synthetic groove of that last one. He would have been surrounded by painted up blonde girls wearing hot pants and go go boots. The girls would have danced over the top renditions of popular 60's steps that would have seemed quaint and adorable.

There would be a giant peace sign above the stage right below the Budweiser logo. Jimi would conclude with the Star Spangled Banner and there would be not a dry eye in the house...
(deep sigh)
We miss ya, Jimi. You could have been Mickey Mouse. {:8())-]]> Wed, 28 Nov 2012 08:50:00 GMT D94B9D65FFC1C50728DBBC436FBC2938 A plea for mercy from a real turkey... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3033697 &quot;Well, folks...It's that time of year again. Time for yours truly to make for the fences. I must make a break for it before ending up a plucked remnant of my former self. A pitiful object. Dead and bloated. Stuffing in my butt. Tryptophan oozing from my stiff basted carcass. I have a family you know. Twelve little ones running around. Unaware that their dear old dad is about to become oven fodder. Hey...dad...fodder...kinda funny, no? I digress... Just remember, Miles Standish, when your fat stubby little fingers are reaching for that drumstick, that so called drumstick is not a drumstick at all...IT'S A LEG!!!! Yes...a leg. Stop the genocide. Eat a duck. Why a duck? Why not? Happy Thanksgiving, Folks.&quot; Sunday, November 25 6:00 pm ROCKABILLY SUNDAYS!!! The Blue Comet 106 S. Easton Rd. Glenside, PA

"Well, folks...It's that time of year again. Time for yours truly to make for the fences. I must make a break for it before ending up a plucked remnant of my former self. A pitiful object. Dead and bloated. Stuffing in my butt. Tryptophan oozing from my stiff basted carcass. I have a family you know. Twelve little ones running around. Unaware that their dear old dad is about to become oven fodder. Hey...dad...fodder...kinda funny, no? I digress...
Just remember, Miles Standish, when your fat stubby little fingers are reaching for that drumstick, that so called drumstick is not a drumstick at all...IT'S A LEG!!!! Yes...a leg. Stop the genocide. Eat a duck. Why a duck? Why not?
Happy Thanksgiving, Folks."

Sunday, November 25
6:00 pm
ROCKABILLY SUNDAYS!!!
The Blue Comet
106 S. Easton Rd.
Glenside, PA
]]> Wed, 21 Nov 2012 18:56:40 GMT 25248D4D1EB42EDD526D0DE8FE039B3C A Corny Come On... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=3010929 (Read the following message out loud in the most annoyingly Caucasian affectation that you can muster. Some of you are already there. No really... Do it. It'll be fun.) Hey Cats n Kittens, This Saturday night you'd better put on your glad rags, grab your best gal or guy and hightail it down to the Swing Kat Swing Dance in Pottstown, Pa. Those way out hep hooligans from NYC the Gas House Gorillas will be swingin' like a rusty gate with the swinginest solid swingitude that ever swung for a bunch of shoe changing swingers! You dig? Awe, c'mon, Jack. Don't be such a square. It's gonna be a real gone mellow scene. Well alreet then, Gates! All you rugcutters are gonna dig the righteous swingadelia of the swingtatious... Ugh... My head hurts. Bring money. Buy a t-shirt and behave yourself, ya jerk. We love you... Well, some of you. {:8())- Saturday, November 17 9:00 pm Swing Kat's Ballroom on High 310 High St Pottstown, Pennsylvania
(Read the following message out loud in the most annoyingly Caucasian affectation that you can muster. Some of you are already there. No really... Do it. It'll be fun.)
Hey Cats n Kittens,
This Saturday night you'd better put on your glad rags, grab your best gal or guy and hightail it down to the Swing Kat Swing Dance in Pottstown, Pa.
Those way out hep hooligans from NYC the Gas House Gorillas will be swingin' like a rusty gate with the swinginest solid swingitude that ever swung for a bunch of shoe changing swingers! You dig?
Awe, c'mon, Jack. Don't be such a square.
It's gonna be a real gone mellow scene.
Well alreet then, Gates!
All you rugcutters are gonna dig the righteous swingadelia of the swingtatious...
Ugh...
My head hurts.
Bring money.
Buy a t-shirt and behave yourself, ya jerk.
We love you...
Well, some of you. {:8())-

Saturday, November 17
9:00 pm
Swing Kat's Ballroom on High
310 High St
Pottstown, Pennsylvania]]> Fri, 16 Nov 2012 20:42:12 GMT 9A7A5CE1052A369C05A2128FEF6F3239 Tonight's show just got more interesting! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2981188 Ladies and Genitals, This evening the Gas House Gorillas will be sharing the stage with our friends <a target="_new" href="http://www.ottoandgeorge.com/">Otto and George! The show starts at 9:30 pm sharp! Otto and George will be the opener, so get there on time. If you are unfamiliar with their work (shame on you), let me assure you that they are an act of sophistication and refinement. Kind of like a ventriloquist act from hell. But funnier...MUCH funnier! This will be a special night. {:8())- Saturday, November 10 9:00 pm Roxy &amp; Dukes 745 Bound Brook Rd Dunellen, New Jersey

Ladies and Genitals,
This evening the Gas House Gorillas will be sharing the stage with our friends
Otto and George!
The show starts at 9:30 pm sharp!
Otto and George will be the opener, so get there on time.
If you are unfamiliar with their work (shame on you), let me assure you that they are an act of sophistication and refinement.
Kind of like a ventriloquist act from hell.
But funnier...MUCH funnier!
This will be a special night.
{:8())-

Saturday, November 10
9:00 pm
Roxy & Dukes
745 Bound Brook Rd
Dunellen, New Jersey]]> Sun, 11 Nov 2012 02:30:00 GMT B4EF631927D22AB39C0166AD00619806 Cancellation! http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2931874 The Gas House Gorillas would like our friends who were adversely affected by Hurricane Sandy to know that you are in our thoughts this week. Due to the storm the Summit Swing Dance Party that was scheduled for this Saturday has been canceled. The show will be rescheduled for the Spring. Be safe, people. We'll see you soon. Shut up! {:8())- Saturday, November 10 9:00 pm Roxy &amp; Dukes 745 Bound Brook Rd Dunellen, New Jersey
The Gas House Gorillas would like our friends who were adversely affected by Hurricane Sandy to know that you are in our thoughts this week. Due to the storm the Summit Swing Dance Party that was scheduled for this Saturday has been canceled. The show will be rescheduled for the Spring.
Be safe, people.
We'll see you soon.
Shut up! {:8())-

Saturday, November 10
9:00 pm
Roxy & Dukes
745 Bound Brook Rd
Dunellen, New Jersey]]> Thu, 01 Nov 2012 21:52:36 GMT 8EAAE13C3A6A86D791C27EDC98DC23E8 A spooky Gorilla makes his debut! Whatever that means... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2882497 What better way to celebrate the silliest of holidays than to celebrate with the silliest of bands??? That's right, Snaggle Tooth... Halloween and The Gas House Gorillas. A match made in Hell. Saturday, October 27 9:00 pm Happy Halloween! The Twisted Tail 509 S. 2nd Street Philadelphia, PA You will witness the debut of our brand new Gorilla...THIS GUY! Matt Osburn &nbsp;
What better way to celebrate the silliest of holidays than to celebrate with the silliest of bands???
That's right, Snaggle Tooth...
Halloween and The Gas House Gorillas.
A match made in Hell.

Saturday, October 27
9:00 pm
Happy Halloween!
The Twisted Tail
509 S. 2nd Street
Philadelphia, PA

You will witness the debut of our brand new Gorilla...THIS GUY!


Matt Osburn
 ]]> Wed, 24 Oct 2012 07:42:23 GMT 0B963E96F3F600B3FC69855A97363605 A plea for sanity in a time of indifference... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2673991 <a target="_new" href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Gas-House-Gorillas/132451040165027?ref=hl"> The voice of Sally Struthers: &quot;Each night, little Emanuel is forced to sleep on a bed of rusty nails in a tiny shoebox after being fed a meal of broken glass and scrap metal. He is beaten several times a day with a tire iron when he is not being kicked around the house like some sort of yelping soccer ball. His eyes are considered a delicacy in places like Staten Island and so will be plucked from his adorable little skull to be sold on the black market. Those ears will make a fine pair of ashtrays for some upper crust fish head with a keen eye for the finer things and a hacking cough that would make Lucille Ball cringe. Look at that sad dejected little fella...sniff...(voice quivering)&hellip;what kind of a selfish depraved cretin would allow this innocent to come to such harm? You CAN make a difference, you know. If you will just click &quot;like&quot; on the <a target="_new" href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Gas-House-Gorillas/132451040165027?ref=hl">Gas House Gorillas' Facebook page...I promise not to do any of those things to this dog. Hurry up... I might change my mind. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA...&quot; Upcoming events Friday, September 21 8:00 pm MOBTOWN GREASEBALL PRE-PARTY!!!! Dundalk Moose Lodge : 2800 Sollers Point Rd, Dundalk, Maryland Friday, September 28 9:00 pm Liberty Tavern 50 S. Liberty Street, #104, Powell, Ohio Saturday, September 29 8:00 pm Blue 5 312 2 nd St., Roanoke, VA Sunday, September 30 12:00 pm &ndash; 5:00 pm Jersey Fresh Wine Festival Burlington County Fairgrounds : Rt. 206, Springfield Twp, New Jersey Sunday, October 7 6:00 pm ROCKABILLY SUNDAYS!!! The Blue Comet: 106 S. Easton Rd., Glenside, PA

The voice of Sally Struthers:

"Each night, little Emanuel is forced to sleep on a bed of rusty nails in a tiny shoebox after being fed a meal of broken glass and scrap metal. He is beaten several times a day with a tire iron when he is not being kicked around the house like some sort of yelping soccer ball. His eyes are considered a delicacy in places like Staten Island and so will be plucked from his adorable little skull to be sold on the black market. Those ears will make a fine pair of ashtrays for some upper crust fish head with a keen eye for the finer things and a hacking cough that would make Lucille Ball cringe. Look at that sad dejected little fella...sniff...(voice quivering)…what kind of a selfish depraved cretin would allow this innocent to come to such harm? You CAN make a difference, you know. If you will just click "like" on the Gas House Gorillas' Facebook page...I promise not to do any of those things to this dog.
Hurry up...
I might change my mind.
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA..."

Upcoming events

Friday, September 21
8:00 pm
MOBTOWN GREASEBALL PRE-PARTY!!!!
Dundalk Moose Lodge : 2800 Sollers Point Rd, Dundalk, Maryland


Friday, September 28
9:00 pm
Liberty Tavern
50 S. Liberty Street, #104, Powell, Ohio

Saturday, September 29
8:00 pm
Blue 5
312 2 nd St., Roanoke, VA

Sunday, September 30
12:00 pm – 5:00 pm
Jersey Fresh Wine Festival
Burlington County Fairgrounds : Rt. 206, Springfield Twp, New Jersey

Sunday, October 7
6:00 pm
ROCKABILLY SUNDAYS!!!
The Blue Comet: 106 S. Easton Rd., Glenside, PA

]]> Wed, 19 Sep 2012 08:00:00 GMT F42526B824D88873AE2C8E2603F3DF94 PA, NYC & Wine in NJ... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2639806 We,The Gas House Gorillas, had a great trip down south this past week. In the words of our own Eddie Eggs via Facebook yesterday: &quot;I just got back from The Gas House Gorillas tour....Thursday was Pomeroy, Ohio- Always a good time at The Court St Grill..Friday we survived 6 lugs coming off our tire,a snake and a vulture and still made it to Nashville,Tennesee to The Blues and Boogie Bar! Great staff, made some new fans and met our booking agent Crystal Crawford....Saturday we played a juke joint in Tallahasee, Florida that was on the chitlin circuit back in the day. Awesome crowd, cool place and we did a radio broadcast....Sunday we did a gig in Sebastian, Florida at Earls Hideaway. Another great crowd, new fans, excellent sound man... I love this band and my Gretsch drums...Goodnight Sweethearts.&quot; We love Eddie...and we love you! Well, some of you... This weekend promises to be a real barn burner! I'll be funnier next week when I'm not so tired...Goodnight Sweethearts. Upcoming events Friday, September 14 9:00 pm Swing Kat's Ballroom on High 310 High St, Pottstown, Pennsylvania Saturday, September 15 12:00 pm - 5:00 pm Valenzano Winery 1320 Old Indian Mills Road, Shamong, New Jersey Saturday, September 15 10:30 pm Rodeo Bar 375 3rd Ave., New York City, NY Sunday, September 16 12:00 pm - 5:00 pm Valenzano Winery 1320 Old Indian Mills Road, Shamong, New Jersey Friday, September 21 8:00 pm MOBTOWN GREASEBALL PRE-PARTY!!!! Dundalk Moose Lodge : 2800 Sollers Point Rd, Dundalk, Maryland
We,The Gas House Gorillas, had a great trip down south this past week. In the words of our own Eddie Eggs via Facebook yesterday:

"I just got back from The Gas House Gorillas tour....Thursday was Pomeroy, Ohio- Always a good time at The Court St Grill..Friday we survived 6 lugs coming off our tire,a snake and a vulture and still made it to Nashville,Tennesee to The Blues and Boogie Bar! Great staff, made some new fans and met our booking agent Crystal Crawford....Saturday we played a juke joint in Tallahasee, Florida that was on the chitlin circuit back in the day. Awesome crowd, cool place and we did a radio broadcast....Sunday we did a gig in Sebastian, Florida at Earls Hideaway. Another great crowd, new fans, excellent sound man... I love this band and my Gretsch drums...Goodnight Sweethearts."

We love Eddie...and we love you! Well, some of you...

This weekend promises to be a real barn burner!
I'll be funnier next week when I'm not so tired...Goodnight Sweethearts.

Upcoming events

Friday, September 14
9:00 pm
Swing Kat's Ballroom on High
310 High St, Pottstown, Pennsylvania

Saturday, September 15
12:00 pm - 5:00 pm
Valenzano Winery
1320 Old Indian Mills Road, Shamong, New Jersey

Saturday, September 15
10:30 pm
Rodeo Bar
375 3rd Ave., New York City, NY

Sunday, September 16
12:00 pm - 5:00 pm
Valenzano Winery
1320 Old Indian Mills Road, Shamong, New Jersey

Friday, September 21
8:00 pm
MOBTOWN GREASEBALL PRE-PARTY!!!!
Dundalk Moose Lodge : 2800 Sollers Point Rd, Dundalk, Maryland



]]> Thu, 13 Sep 2012 08:17:55 GMT 85F5B4C47EA6116137B2E15C86B04F06 We come in pieces! Gorillas go south... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2586411 This week your Gorillas are heading south!!! We are really looking forward to making new friends down there. Despite our gruff demeanor, we are actually a swell bunch of guys. No really. For instance, when Crusher says &quot;Shut up&quot; to an audience member...he's kidding. No really. When Rick makes a snide remark to a particular person who seems less than enthused by the idea of singing along with the rest of us...kidding. Seriously, Folks. When some half-baked simpleton, who has obviously been to a few of our shows, so should really know better, but nonetheless decides to waste two minutes of our precious time in order to inquire as to whether we would be so inclined as to play that stupid Van Morrison song that we've all heard ad nausea time and time again on those awful Classic Rock radio stations, who act as if it's the only song this guy has ever recorded, never mind the fact that the man still continues to record new material to this day, is greeted with a resounding unison chorus of &quot;What? F___k off, ya jerk!&quot;... Kidding, kidding, kidding. We LOVE that guy! We love EVERYBODY. Even those that we don't really care for. We, that is The Gas House Gorillas, are people guys. C'mon out and give us a hug! On second thought, forget the hug. Buy a tshirt! Let's have some fun! Thursday, September 6 8:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio Friday, September 7 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bourbon St. Blues &amp; Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN Saturday, September 8 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida Sunday, September 9 2:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida
This week your Gorillas are heading south!!!
We are really looking forward to making new friends down there.
Despite our gruff demeanor, we are actually a swell bunch of guys. No really. For instance, when Crusher says "Shut up" to an audience member...he's kidding. No really. When Rick makes a snide remark to a particular person who seems less than enthused by the idea of singing along with the rest of us...kidding. Seriously, Folks. When some half-baked simpleton, who has obviously been to a few of our shows, so should really know better, but nonetheless decides to waste two minutes of our precious time in order to inquire as to whether we would be so inclined as to play that stupid Van Morrison song that we've all heard ad nausea time and time again on those awful Classic Rock radio stations, who act as if it's the only song this guy has ever recorded, never mind the fact that the man still continues to record new material to this day, is greeted with a resounding unison chorus of
"What? F___k off, ya jerk!"...
Kidding, kidding, kidding.
We LOVE that guy!
We love EVERYBODY.
Even those that we don't really care for.
We, that is The Gas House Gorillas, are people guys.
C'mon out and give us a hug!
On second thought, forget the hug.
Buy a tshirt!
Let's have some fun!


Thursday, September 6
8:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio

Friday, September 7
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bourbon St. Blues & Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN

Saturday, September 8
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida

Sunday, September 9
2:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida
]]> Tue, 04 Sep 2012 22:16:56 GMT A846B5977D5CA0D6DF5042B1DE3DEE5A Labor Day weekend usually means the arrival of... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2551031 this guy! Not anymore, Mother Jones! It now means the arrival of... this guy? Hide the liquor. Upcoming events Saturday, September 1 9:00 pm GOTTASWING DANCE! Glen Echo Park Bumper Car Pavilion: Glen Echo, MD Sunday, September 2 8:00 pm Asbury Park &quot;LABOR DAY BBQ&quot; Bradley Park : 1300 Ocean Ave, Asbury Park, NJ The Boys &amp; Girls Club of Monmouth County Presents: The largest community BBQ ever! Sat/Sun noon-10pm Mon noon-6pm &bull; Every type of BBQ imaginable, brisket, chicken, Beef, Pork, Scallops, sausage, etc plus a mix of all your other festival favorites! (crab cakes, funnel cakes, sausage peppers, gyros etc...) &bull; Huge Beer and wine garden! &bull; 20 Live bands including Country, Classic Rock, pop, jazz, blues and regaee! &bull; Huge Children's area with mechanical rides, inflatables &amp; face painters. Share Thursday, September 6 8:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio Friday, September 7 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bourbon St. Blues &amp; Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN Saturday, September 8 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida Sunday, September 9 2:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida &nbsp;

this guy!

Not anymore, Mother Jones!

It now means the arrival of...



this guy?

Hide the liquor.

Upcoming events

Saturday, September 1
9:00 pm
GOTTASWING DANCE!
Glen Echo Park Bumper Car Pavilion: Glen Echo, MD

Sunday, September 2
8:00 pm
Asbury Park "LABOR DAY BBQ"
Bradley Park : 1300 Ocean Ave, Asbury Park, NJ
The Boys & Girls Club of Monmouth County Presents: The largest community BBQ ever!

Sat/Sun noon-10pm
Mon noon-6pm

• Every type of BBQ imaginable, brisket, chicken, Beef, Pork, Scallops, sausage, etc plus a mix of all your other festival favorites! (crab cakes, funnel cakes, sausage peppers, gyros etc...)
• Huge Beer and wine garden!
• 20 Live bands including Country, Classic Rock, pop, jazz, blues and regaee!
• Huge Children's area with mechanical rides, inflatables & face painters.
Share

Thursday, September 6
8:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio

Friday, September 7
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bourbon St. Blues & Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN

Saturday, September 8
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida

Sunday, September 9
2:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida
 ]]> Wed, 29 Aug 2012 08:04:38 GMT 6073805579631C4B7F142100D56F4738 Fifty Shades of Gorilla http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2510183 The door opens and Joe Gorilla breezes in, ignoring me completely. I lie in waiting, arms and hands tied together like some helpless steer waiting to be marked by his red hot poker. Placing his hat on the large chest beside the door, he walks on his knuckles casually toward the bed. I indulge myself in a quick glimpse at him and my heart almost lurches to a gag reflex. He's naked except for that kilt, top button casually undone. Flies buzzing over head. Devil may care demeanor. Jeez, he looks so freaking furry. Kind of disgusting, but in a sexy way. What a beast! My subconscious is frantically fanning herself, and my inner goddess is swaying and writhing to some clich&eacute;d primal carnal rhythm, like something you'd imagine an inner goddess would writhe to. She's so ready. I lick my lips instinctively. He licks his. My blood pounds through my body, thick and heavy with salacious juiciness. What is he going to do to me? Turning, he nonchalantly waddles back to the chest of drawers. Opening one, he pulls out a bunch of bananas. My curiosity burns, blazes even as he pulls one ripe banana from the bunch. He comes to stand in front of me, like a hairy god or some other ridiculous metaphor. I see the yellow fruit in his hand and want to eat every inch of it. He begins to peel it, one strand at a time, pausing every so often, as if I weren't even there. What a tease! He then eats the banana, belches in my general direction, farts, and climbs out the window. Hot! Upcoming events: Friday, August 24 7:30 pm Grounds For Sculpture 18 Fairgrounds Road, Hamilton, New Jersey Purchase tickets in advance to avoid a park admission fee. Call 609-586-0616, Tuesday&ndash;Sunday, 10 am&ndash;6 pm. Advance purchase ends August 23rd @ 5 pm. Saturday, August 25 4:30 pm &ndash; 6:00 pm North River Blues Festival Saturday, September 1 9:00 pm GOTTASWING DANCE! Glen Echo Park Bumper Car Pavilion: Glen Echo, MD Thursday, September 6 8:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio Friday, September 7 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bourbon St. Blues &amp; Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN Saturday, September 8 10:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida Sunday, September 9 2:00 pm THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR! Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida
The door opens and Joe Gorilla breezes in, ignoring me completely. I lie in waiting, arms and hands tied together like some helpless steer waiting to be marked by his red hot poker. Placing his hat on the large chest beside the door, he walks on his knuckles casually toward the bed. I indulge myself in a quick glimpse at him and my heart almost lurches to a gag reflex. He's naked except for that kilt, top button casually undone. Flies buzzing over head. Devil may care demeanor. Jeez, he looks so freaking furry. Kind of disgusting, but in a sexy way. What a beast! My subconscious is frantically fanning herself, and my inner goddess is swaying and writhing to some clichéd primal carnal rhythm, like something you'd imagine an inner goddess would writhe to. She's so ready. I lick my lips instinctively. He licks his. My blood pounds through my body, thick and heavy with salacious juiciness. What is he going to do to me?

Turning, he nonchalantly waddles back to the chest of drawers. Opening one, he pulls out a bunch of bananas. My curiosity burns, blazes even as he pulls one ripe banana from the bunch. He comes to stand in front of me, like a hairy god or some other ridiculous metaphor. I see the yellow fruit in his hand and want to eat every inch of it. He begins to peel it, one strand at a time, pausing every so often, as if I weren't even there. What a tease! He then eats the banana, belches in my general direction, farts, and climbs out the window. Hot!

Upcoming events:

Friday, August 24
7:30 pm
Grounds For Sculpture
18 Fairgrounds Road, Hamilton, New Jersey
Purchase tickets in advance to avoid a park admission fee. Call 609-586-0616, Tuesday–Sunday, 10 am–6 pm. Advance purchase ends August 23rd @ 5 pm.

Saturday, August 25
4:30 pm – 6:00 pm
North River Blues Festival


Saturday, September 1
9:00 pm
GOTTASWING DANCE!
Glen Echo Park Bumper Car Pavilion: Glen Echo, MD

Thursday, September 6
8:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Court Street Grill: 112 Court Street, Pomeroy, Ohio

Friday, September 7
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bourbon St. Blues & Boogie Bar: 220 Printer's Alley, Nashville, TN

Saturday, September 8
10:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Bradfordville Blues Club: 7152 Moses Lane, Tallahassee, Florida

Sunday, September 9
2:00 pm
THE SOUTHERN HOSTILITY TOUR!
Earl's Hideaway: 1405 Indian River Drive, Sebastian, Florida
]]> Wed, 22 Aug 2012 08:35:00 GMT 5E6D134FC3FB0FE134A5C263548DA811 Jump on the Gorillas' Bandwagon... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2415567 'Cause jumping is fun, Jasper! When you see your Gorillas jumping, we are in fact having fun. You remember fun. Fun is the the thing you don't have when you go see that Muddy Waters tribute band from the mean streets of Summit, NJ. When you get Purell in a paper cut...not fun. People who tend to frequent Star Trek conventions and nude beaches (for the most part)...not fun. Jumping, on the other hand...fun...fun...and more fun. Just ask a five year old. The Gas House Gorillas know how to jump! Hence, my dear Watson, we know how to have fun. Come out and get a lesson, Sourpuss. And put your &quot;fun&quot; face on! You know, the one with the smile on it. Not to worry. We'll help you find it... Wednesday, August 8 7:30 pm &ndash; 11:00 pm Musikfest! Bethlehem, PA Wed 8/8 , 7:30pm-8:30pm KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas Wed 8/8 , 9:30pm-11:00pm KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas Saturday, August 11 6:00 pm &ndash; 8:00 pm Street Music on Paris Ave Old Village Port Royal : Paris Avenue, Port Royal, SC Saturday, August 18 8:00 pm Jersey Jumpers' Swing Dance! Suzanne Patterson Center: 45 Stockton Street, Princeton, NJ Friday, August 24 7:30 pm Grounds For Sculpture 18 Fairgrounds Road, Hamilton, New Jersey Purchase tickets in advance to avoid a park admission fee. Call 609-586-0616, Tuesday&ndash;Sunday, 10 am&ndash;6 pm. Advance purchase ends August 23rd @ 5 pm. Info Phone: 609-586-0616 Saturday, August 25 4:30 pm &ndash; 6:00 pm North River Blues Festival
'Cause jumping is fun, Jasper!
When you see your Gorillas jumping, we are in fact having fun.
You remember fun.
Fun is the the thing you don't have when you go see that Muddy Waters tribute band from the mean streets of Summit, NJ.
When you get Purell in a paper cut...not fun.
People who tend to frequent Star Trek conventions and nude beaches (for the most part)...not fun.
Jumping, on the other hand...fun...fun...and more fun.
Just ask a five year old.
The Gas House Gorillas know how to jump!
Hence, my dear Watson, we know how to have fun.
Come out and get a lesson, Sourpuss.
And put your "fun" face on!
You know, the one with the smile on it.
Not to worry.
We'll help you find it...

Wednesday, August 8
7:30 pm – 11:00 pm
Musikfest!
Bethlehem, PA

Wed 8/8 ,
7:30pm-8:30pm
KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas

Wed 8/8 ,
9:30pm-11:00pm
KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas


Saturday, August 11
6:00 pm – 8:00 pm
Street Music on Paris Ave
Old Village Port Royal : Paris Avenue, Port Royal, SC

Saturday, August 18
8:00 pm
Jersey Jumpers' Swing Dance!
Suzanne Patterson Center: 45 Stockton Street, Princeton, NJ

Friday, August 24
7:30 pm
Grounds For Sculpture
18 Fairgrounds Road, Hamilton, New Jersey
Purchase tickets in advance to avoid a park admission fee. Call 609-586-0616, Tuesday–Sunday, 10 am–6 pm. Advance purchase ends August 23rd @ 5 pm.
Info Phone: 609-586-0616

Saturday, August 25 4:30 pm – 6:00 pm
North River Blues Festival

]]> Tue, 07 Aug 2012 16:55:00 GMT B696A73E29E1B66C19486A2ABC38E2C6 A heartfelt note to any poor soul who may have been offended by your Gorillas... http://thegashousegorillas.com/blog.cfm?feature=2365452&postid=2377078 We are what we is... Upcoming events Friday, August 3 9:00 pm Roxy &amp; Dukes 745 Bound Brook Rd, Dunellen, New Jersey Sunday, August 5 7:00 pm &ndash; 9:00 pm Blues By the Beach West End Park: Corner of Brighton &amp; Ocean Avenues, Long Branch, NJ Wednesday, August 8 7:30 pm &ndash; 11:00 pm Musikfest! Bethlehem, PA 7:30pm-8:30pm KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas 9:30pm-11:00pm KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas Saturday, August 11 6:00 pm &ndash; 8:00 pm Street Music on Paris Ave Old Village Port Royal : Paris Avenue, Port Royal, SC

We are what we is...


Upcoming events

Friday, August 3
9:00 pm
Roxy & Dukes
745 Bound Brook Rd, Dunellen, New Jersey

Sunday, August 5
7:00 pm – 9:00 pm
Blues By the Beach
West End Park: Corner of Brighton & Ocean Avenues, Long Branch, NJ


Wednesday, August 8
7:30 pm – 11:00 pm
Musikfest!
Bethlehem, PA
7:30pm-8:30pm
KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas
9:30pm-11:00pm
KNBT Jazz Cabaret Stage at Frank Banko Alehouse Cinemas


Saturday, August 11
6:00 pm – 8:00 pm
Street Music on Paris Ave
Old Village Port Royal : Paris Avenue, Port Royal, SC ]]> Wed, 01 Aug 2012 16:28:25 GMT 2B4C12FDE2C324EFFABD82016C72DADD